Time goes by way too quickly, just a minute ago it was 9:00 and now its 10:06.. ?!?!? and yesterday it was Dec 1st and now all of a sudden its the 12th??? I think time is cheating me.
This post will have two parts
1. Semantics:
I just had another thought about semantics. The way we always say "they" to refer to that group of others who produce our material culture, decide which courses to offer us at school, basically anyone who has decided what we have the option to consume and how we consume it as well. We all do it. We'll be standing in front of a magazine stand and one of us will wonder out loud "I wonder why they decided to put so and so on the cover?" and the other will respond with some possible theories or simply think "Do they ever have a reason for doing what they do?" We talk as if "they" are looming above us sending things down for us to consume... or at least that is how the idea manifests itself into my head. But why do we imagine this "they" as sort of higher up individuals, they are most likely walking among us as we gaze at the magazine stand. We could even be they. In fact, I know some 'they's. But for some reason the word, in this context, signifies a mysterious other. Someone we don't know, have no control over but has some sort of omniscient power over us.
Language is just such a big cultural signifier. In this "they" case I think it says something about the way we perceive power structures in our society today. "They" in many of our minds do loom above us giving us a sense of powerlessness to make change. We take they for granted as if they were always there and the decisions they make out of our control. Some people aren't even aware they exist.
2. English:
Since France, I've started to see English in a completely different way. Sometimes I'll look at the way I've spelt a word and second guess myself thinking it looks completely foreign (for example I actually did just dictionary.com 'they' because for a second there the combination of letters looked really bizarre to me). This happened a lot in France. I'd be teaching a class and then I'd look on the board and think my god English is a bizarre looking language. Having a bunch of French students spend a whole class laughing because "I put my foot in my mouth" is a common phrase really makes you look again at what you say. Like 'phrase' I mean why on earth did we put a p and an h together and make it go ffffff?!? Anyways, French makes more sense to me even if I'm not fully bilingual. I'll look at French and think yes yes that makes sense and I'll look at something in English and think it looks like a bunch of gibberish if it weren't for the fact that I understand it. What an awful Latin/Germanic bastard language that I somehow was born into. Oh but I love it. What an awesome language English is and what a horribly biased thing to say. It is so much fun. As this article states " no masculine, feminine, neuter, acute, grave or cedilla" give English "its witty flexibility, its gift for pun and double meaning". I'd like to see the exhibit that article is talking about. A bunch of words on old paper aaahhh what a beautiful site that would be.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Monday, December 6, 2010
Walking home from the station while the snow is decidedly falling on a horizontal angle is not such a good idea. However, the sparkles the snow makes when they reflect the lights is just so very pretty it makes the whole walk worth it.
So I've decided to give up this reverb thing. Mainly because I'm not so inspired by the questions they keep asking. Maybe they will get better? I will try and post my own thoughts on the past year and plans for the next as December lumbers on and maybe that on its own will have some interesting results...? As my one of my "flatmates" from last year always said, "On verra..."
In the meantime here is a beautiful animation to entertain you:
So I've decided to give up this reverb thing. Mainly because I'm not so inspired by the questions they keep asking. Maybe they will get better? I will try and post my own thoughts on the past year and plans for the next as December lumbers on and maybe that on its own will have some interesting results...? As my one of my "flatmates" from last year always said, "On verra..."
In the meantime here is a beautiful animation to entertain you:
Friday, December 3, 2010
no dipppp for my chiipppss...
Anyways the point of this post is to do the reverb10 question before tomorrow. I have 1 and a half hours. Here goes!
December 3 – Moment.
Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors).
This. one. is. really. hard. Mainly because of my mind for the past few years. It's just been on pause really while the rest of me does cool exciting things. I've met interesting people, been interesting places, traveled the farthest I've ever been away from home to visit one of my best friends, yet still I wouldn't use the word 'alive' to describe the way I've felt. So I'm going with the first thing that popped (almost wrote pooped there it's been a lonnng day) into my head. This would be that trip to London. Two days and only 2 hours by train from where I was living in France but this trip just continues to stick out in my mind. The weather was bright and cold (that nippy at your nose kinda cold where you're not too cold but in the perfect middly kind of cold). Went to meet someone I knew from York for drinks the one night we were there. Some people just manage to get you talking about things you'd forgotten you loved to talk about because no one had talked about them with you in ages, nothing particularly mind blowing but it was nice. Went to the Tower of London the second day of bright sunniness and I think if I could hug a museum I would hug this one. It was just very much worth my 14 pounds. It's like when I went to Monet's gardens in Giverny, it was just one of those childhood dreams to see the place that I had read about as a kid and never really had imagined I'd get to see in real life cause it was so far away. Anyways, to conclude, I think this was one of the only times this past year that I've felt my mind has really been fully present... in the present... and I think, in general, that when you're present like that and happy with it those are the times when you feel most alive.
December 3 – Moment.
Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors).
This. one. is. really. hard. Mainly because of my mind for the past few years. It's just been on pause really while the rest of me does cool exciting things. I've met interesting people, been interesting places, traveled the farthest I've ever been away from home to visit one of my best friends, yet still I wouldn't use the word 'alive' to describe the way I've felt. So I'm going with the first thing that popped (almost wrote pooped there it's been a lonnng day) into my head. This would be that trip to London. Two days and only 2 hours by train from where I was living in France but this trip just continues to stick out in my mind. The weather was bright and cold (that nippy at your nose kinda cold where you're not too cold but in the perfect middly kind of cold). Went to meet someone I knew from York for drinks the one night we were there. Some people just manage to get you talking about things you'd forgotten you loved to talk about because no one had talked about them with you in ages, nothing particularly mind blowing but it was nice. Went to the Tower of London the second day of bright sunniness and I think if I could hug a museum I would hug this one. It was just very much worth my 14 pounds. It's like when I went to Monet's gardens in Giverny, it was just one of those childhood dreams to see the place that I had read about as a kid and never really had imagined I'd get to see in real life cause it was so far away. Anyways, to conclude, I think this was one of the only times this past year that I've felt my mind has really been fully present... in the present... and I think, in general, that when you're present like that and happy with it those are the times when you feel most alive.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
i almost didn't do this
but i said i would and i will and ill stick to it i will.
December 2 - Writing.
What do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to your writing — and can you eliminate it?
I go to work each day. And no I can't eliminate it because I'm dirt poor. For awhile I was writing poems on empty receipts during morning shifts when I was alone and bored. Maybe I'll post those on here someday they're not half bad. But the joy of blissful morning shifts has been sucked out of me by the Christmas gods. One thing I would like to do to write more fiction is pick a day each week (the same one so it becomes a routine) and go to a café and sit and write for a few hours. Maybe I'll get around to asking friends if they would like to join me. I work better when I can tell people about my ideas as I write them... or write for awhile and then run it by someone else. I just work better in a pair.
December 2 - Writing.
What do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to your writing — and can you eliminate it?
I go to work each day. And no I can't eliminate it because I'm dirt poor. For awhile I was writing poems on empty receipts during morning shifts when I was alone and bored. Maybe I'll post those on here someday they're not half bad. But the joy of blissful morning shifts has been sucked out of me by the Christmas gods. One thing I would like to do to write more fiction is pick a day each week (the same one so it becomes a routine) and go to a café and sit and write for a few hours. Maybe I'll get around to asking friends if they would like to join me. I work better when I can tell people about my ideas as I write them... or write for awhile and then run it by someone else. I just work better in a pair.
reverb10
The lovely Hezabelle has taken on the reverb10 challenge and has inspired me to try it too. It's going to be one crazy busy month with work and christmas preparations and school applications to finish and more school applications to begin, but I thought it would be nice to have something steady to do every day. Basically you're supposed to reflect on the past year and "manifest what's next" by using daily prompts from reverb10.
I missed yesterday's so I'll do it now:
December 1 One Word.
Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word. Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you?
Challenging
2010 started with a great bang. I celebrated its arrival with a good friend in Edinburgh and then spent its first days wandering around a bright sunny and perfectly chilled London. I just turned the calendar I bought for half price at the London Transport Museum to its last page and it doesn't feel like its been a year. Yet, despite these hopeful beginnings, the year was an emotional and mental rollercoaster. By moving to France I hadn't given myself time to deal with previous years' emotional issues and I arrived in the country a bit of a nutcase. This, coupled with my worrying about the future starting around mid-February and trying to articulate all this in French to my new friends, resulted in a very stressed steph. All in all a challenging year.
Scholarly
By December 2011 I hope for nothing more than to be buried in a big noisy university library being a massive academic nerd - preferably in a city with underground transport or at least streetcars that go ding ding ;). I never realised how much I liked studying until I finished. I want to sit with a bunch of puffed up academics who make too much money and debate debate debate. That or in a classroom learning how to teach. I'm stupid, I need to learn more. Despite my reservations with academics and the education system, I don't know enough. In order to break the system down you have to know it first. And I'm willing to add to my pile of debt to get there.
I missed yesterday's so I'll do it now:
December 1 One Word.
Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word. Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you?
Challenging
2010 started with a great bang. I celebrated its arrival with a good friend in Edinburgh and then spent its first days wandering around a bright sunny and perfectly chilled London. I just turned the calendar I bought for half price at the London Transport Museum to its last page and it doesn't feel like its been a year. Yet, despite these hopeful beginnings, the year was an emotional and mental rollercoaster. By moving to France I hadn't given myself time to deal with previous years' emotional issues and I arrived in the country a bit of a nutcase. This, coupled with my worrying about the future starting around mid-February and trying to articulate all this in French to my new friends, resulted in a very stressed steph. All in all a challenging year.
Scholarly
By December 2011 I hope for nothing more than to be buried in a big noisy university library being a massive academic nerd - preferably in a city with underground transport or at least streetcars that go ding ding ;). I never realised how much I liked studying until I finished. I want to sit with a bunch of puffed up academics who make too much money and debate debate debate. That or in a classroom learning how to teach. I'm stupid, I need to learn more. Despite my reservations with academics and the education system, I don't know enough. In order to break the system down you have to know it first. And I'm willing to add to my pile of debt to get there.
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